“Horn OK Please” And Other Rules of the Road

Haley has encouraged me to devote a blog to the crazy traffic that gives India the chaotic reputation it has.  I do not know that I can capture it in words.  I have taken a few traffic videos though, so hopefully I can post some at some point in time.  “Horn OK Please” is the title of this post for oh-so-many reasons.  On nearly every truck and commercial vehicle, that is inscribed on the back.  It has become such a mantra here for all of us that Becca was considering getting it as a tattoo for maybe thirty seconds.  It really should be the country motto.  Horns are used in excess here, and not because people are angry.  Some people continue to pound on their horn the entire time they are driving.  I would not be surprised if people go through horns faster than they go through tires.  It is more of a “hey, coming up behind you” or a “watch out, I’m pulling out of my driveway” or a “careful, I’m driving the wrong way down this street!”  Everyone has horns.  Rickshaws either have little buzzing horns or large squeeze horns that sound like something the Marx brothers would use.  Bicycles too have bells that ring constantly. 

 

The topic of scootys also deserves some attention.  A scooty refers to anything that is a two-wheeled vehicle.  It can be a vespa, a moped or a motorcycle.  There are also custom scootys that have two extra wheels in the back usually driven by disabled people who are unable to put a foot down at stop lights.  Scootys are everywhere, and can go everywhere.  Sometimes they will come at you when you are walking down the sidewalk, sometimes they will go against the flow of traffic on almost any street, and they are really ruling the roads here in Pune.  The scooty is really the vehicle of choice for just about any user.  It also appears to come in very handy when hauling large objects.  The choice arrangement for this is driver facing front, passenger facing backwards holding object in need of transport.  Favorites to date: Wide-screen TV still in box, entire computer (Monitor, CPU and keyboard), propane tank (sometimes more than one), and ladder.  Sometimes the passenger will face forward if the object is small enough.  Say a three-foot pane of triangular glass.  That is just an accident waiting to happen. 

 

Another commonly asked question in India is “how many people can fit on one scooty?” So far I have seen three grown men, Our maid’s family of four each with a large shopping bag, a family of five with two pre-teen children, and two men with three little kids.  So how do you fit a family of five on a scooty?  I’ll tell you.  Baba drives.  Middle-sized child sits in front of him (Or stands on the foot plate if it is a vespa instead of a motorcycle)  largest child sits behind him in traditional motorcycle passenger style, and behind this child sits Ae, side-saddle in her sari with a baby in her arms.  That is how you fit a family of five on a scooty.  A variations on the theme includes the vespa with two children on the foot board which I guess would potentially make it possible to fit six on a scooty. 

 

Honda Hero brand is making a fortune off of this country.  Every other bike on the road is a Honda.  They make several different models and several different colors, but that does not mean anything here really as old men are often found on pink scootys, and Haley’s host mom drives a burnt-orange motorcycle.   

 

Rule of thumb when crossing the street: You can always outrun a rickshaw: Go for it. You can usually outrun a car: Proceed with caution.  You will never outrun a scooty: Proceed slowly and make no sudden movements, they will go around you.  Never try to outrun a bus.  Being hit by a bus is the only certain death on Pune streets.  It simply is not worth the risk.  Bicycles are another story altogether.  I can say with almost complete certainty that they are the biggest risk on the road because they do not follow traffic rules, nor pedestrian rules.  They make sudden, jerky movements and speed up and slow down regularly, and they are also sort of hard to see.  Always watch out for bikes.  That is where the true danger lies. 

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